Mayne Attraction: In The Spotlight Read online

  Normally, with any other creative endeavor, I would make so many passes and edits that the end product was only a vague evolutionary ancestor of the first draft. But with this note, the apologies, the confession and the pleas keyed out perfectly from my mind and onto the screen—no correction or fine-tuning was necessary. I read it over one time, instead of a hundred, saved it, and didn’t make a copy for myself. Desperation had an unexpected side effect: efficiency.

  My main concern was that he might not be the one to find my note. Sometimes I’d see him and leave something behind, but then another agent would collect it. A note like this would be highly damaging if someone besides Ash were to discover it. How could I get around that, short of handing it to him myself, which would probably be even more damaging?

  He looked to be the youngest person on the team, which perhaps meant that he was also the most technologically savvy. I decided to take a chance using a trick someone had played on me in class once.

  I had worked for the better part of a week preparing a presentation for a Senior English project. My document was up on one of the class computers and I had walked away to make sure that the printer was on-line when an error had popped up.

  When I came back, my file was still open, but there was nothing there—nothing but blank pages. I clicked the undo button from the Edit menu, but nothing had been deleted. I nearly had a panic attack induced seizure and the freak-out must have given the perpetrator exactly the sadistic pleasure they’d been going for. Sam came to my rescue and wordlessly put my document back the way it was by highlighting everything and changing the font color from white back to black. Someone had done the same thing to her recently.

  I don’t think I would have figured that out. But I had a feeling that in his group, if anyone could figure it out, it would be the one person I’d want to. Just to provide a slight hint, I named the file ‘Change_The_Color’. Then I left it behind on a jump drive one afternoon at Panera just before Sam, Trevor and I headed off to the movies.

  As soon as we were on our way the second guessing began. Was I insane? How could this not be a train-wreck in the making? I had no business declaring my feelings for this man. Yes, he was really, really handsome and he looked young, but I knew very good and well that he was not a kid like me. So what if he was handsome? So was Ted Bundy. And, okay, it was a long-shot, but what if he liked me too? Then what? Exactly what did I believe I had to offer him—besides the opportunity to get fired while at the same time discovering how very strange and so not worth it I actually was? I’d never dated or come close to it—I had no idea what to say or how to act. Oh yeah, this was a runaway train headed straight for disaster gulch.

  I tried not to think about what was happening while I watched the movie. But I knew it was either one of two things: Ash was figuring it out and making his response…or he wasn’t. I had a feeling that the little jump drive would end up back in my purse somehow before the movie was over and I’d have to wait until I was home to see if he had added any response inside. And then it occurred to me that maybe his response would be a detailed rejection; and having a written refusal that I could review over and over again might be the makings of Heartbreak Debacle two-point-o.

  I decided to focus on the movie and skip the negativity until I had something for sure to be negative about. I also decided to leave my purse behind in the seat next to me to give him an extra opportunity to place my response, since by the end of the movie there was no jump drive inside.

  It was a pretty decent sized audience for a matinee and it took a while to merge into the exiting crowd pushing out the main aisle. Sam and Trevor had no problems cutting into traffic because of the invisible barrier they enjoyed as part of their special Goth super powers. If they’d been holding me between them I could have gotten in on that, but I was lagging behind and had to wait for an opening like a mortal.

  I was thinking about how it would feel go to a movie with Ash and hold hands on the way out, and all during the movie, for that matter. As if in answer to my fantasizing I felt a warm firm grasp around my left hand as I was pulled slightly backwards and into the last row. I wasn’t scared, or even surprised. He got my note…and just maybe…he liked it! Whatever the case, he felt a face-to-face response was in order, and that had to be a good thing.

  He pulled me back towards the center of the row, searching my face to make sure I wasn’t alarmed. What I was could best be described as euphoric. His gorgeous, magnificent face was peering down at my own, and his expression was every bit as euphoric as mine had to be. Then he spoke to me.

  “I think this is yours,” he said in a smooth, quiet voice.

  He still had my hand and turned it up to place something small and plastic inside: a jump drive, but it didn’t feel like mine. It felt like a different kind, with edges that were more rounded.

  Huh.

  He closed my fingers around it and pulled my hand up to the spot over his heart, resting it gently on his chest, adding, “and this,” he said through lips graced with a wonderful warm smile.

  Yes! He loves me too! I knew it!

  My instincts had told me he loved me but I didn’t believe them, fearing disappointment or delusion. Now I swore I’d never doubt them again. I didn’t care that he was a grown-up or that he was sort of a stranger or that I had zero experience in romantic situations. It felt like I was on some kind of emotional autopilot and also bulletproof.

  This was like a dream come true and since something I’d always dreamed about was what it would feel like having his hand on my cheek, I took a chance and moved his free hand to the prerequisite spot. It felt every bit as good as I’d imagined—soft and warm. And just like before, facing him was like standing in the sun. I could feel my skin glowing in response to his warming presence. My instinct was to reach up and kiss him, but I wasn’t remotely bold enough for that so instead I turned his hand that I was holding to my cheek and kissed the top of that. I wasn’t bold enough for that either, but this was a new version of me with feelings that overruled and shoved my shyness aside. I was a little embarrassed with myself, but it felt so good I didn’t care.

  He must have really liked that little move because his breathing picked up and suddenly I was in his arms in the middle of a wonderful close embrace. I squeezed him back as hard as I could.

  “I knew it,” I said softly, my words finally catching up with my mind.

  I could have held on to him like that forever. After so many months of imagining it, the real thing felt exactly as good and perfect and right as I had expected it would.

  But much too soon he let go and said, “I have to leave. And you need to go back and get your purse,” a little smugly, it seemed.

  I considered our very recent embrace and the jump-drive in my hand and thought, No, not really. I’ve got exactly what I need right here.

  Then he pulled my hand up and kissed the top, just like a gentlemen from a BBC period piece.

  “They’re coming,” he said softly, looking over my shoulder at the now empty aisle.

  We were the last people in the theater. He needed me to go now.

  “Oh, Okay. Here. Call me,” I said as I awkwardly fished for an item in my pocket and then handed it over. “I knew it” and “Here, call me” were my brilliant first lines but mercifully he looked very happy with no trace of disapproval or disappointment.

  I had decided that if somehow he’d want to engage me further after my jump drive inquiry, I should give him a way to do that. As part of that plan, I had recently dug out the cell phone I’d been given in Iceland along with the instruction card with its phone number printed on the top. Now I handed him that card and wondered how quickly I might hear from him, knowing I’d be in a high haze until I did. He took the card from my hand and kissed it, laughing a quick, self-conscious sounding laugh, which pulled an involuntary nervous laugh out of me as well.

  He’s even cuter than I thought! How is that possible?

  I couldn’t stand it and I had to look down an
d walk away. At the end of the row I knew I was supposed to go back to my seat, but I was having trouble remembering why.

  Oh! My purse. Right.

  I turned back around to look at him one more time but he was already gone.

  Chapter 19 – Introduction

  I was living in the happiest moment of my life. I felt high. I’d never been high before, but I knew this is what it felt like. Good thing I’d been with Sam and Trevor the entire movie or they might accuse me of substance abuse. I needed to get myself normal before I had to explain anything. Sam was heading back into the theater when I bumped into her as we collided at the corner where the end of the aisle met the vestibule leading back out to the main hallway of the Cineplex.

  “Where’d you go?”

  She was slightly concerned.

  “I…uh…forgot my purse,” I responded truthfully.

  She looked down at my hands to see if I was at the beginning or the end of the process of handling that situation.

  Eyeing my purse she said, “Are you ready?”

  I am so ready! In fact, I might die of readiness tonight.

  Our plan was to head over to Graeter’s for ice cream after the movie. It wouldn’t go over well and I might be forced into a lie if I tried to talk my way out of that, so I just had to settle into patient mode until I could get home and pace like a caged animal in the privacy of my bedroom, waiting for him to call me. Thinking about Ash calling me made me lose focus and I tripped over nothing, very nearly performing a face plant. But Trevor was close and caught me just in time.

  “Hey there space cadet! You all right?”

  He was amused. But I was too out of it to give him the full helping of embarrassment to go along with it.

  “I’m…uh…I’m…ready.”

  They sensed and saw I was not right and silently took up posts on either side of me, each taking an arm as they guided me to Trevor’s car.

  I don’t remember ordering any ice cream but once we were at our table I was eating some. I put the spoon down after a couple of bites. I just couldn’t do it. All my energy, even the involuntary motion of eating double chocolate mousse, was redirected into analyzing the new and euphoric landscape in which I now resided.

  Someone loved me! Not just someone, but the one I loved! The risk of writing a pathetic plea for his affection had paid off! Something was actually going right—incredibly right—for the first time in my life. The feel of his hand on mine, the look on his face, the warmth of his chest when he had indicated that his heart belonged to me—it was all too much. But I was greedy for it and I worked hard to horde all these happy feelings and reflections into myself, letting nothing escape as best I could without being too obvious.

  “What’s wrong with Ellery?” Trevor asked Sam, like I couldn’t hear.

  “I don’t know what it is, but something’s definitely wrong with her,” she replied, like I couldn’t hear.

  Through my abstraction I heard someone’s phone ringing. It just kept on ringing. Suddenly, I realized it was my phone! No one had ever called me on it, so I didn’t know what it sounded like. In a panic that I’d miss his call and then he’d never call me again, I scrambled for the cell phone the way a person with a grenade in their purse might move when they were trying put the pin back in before it exploded.

  Miraculously, I was able to answer the call before it went to voicemail. I paused for a second or two to summon a bit of false decorum. Then the euphoria washed back in like the tide.

  “Hi,” I said.

  The happiness was impossible to suppress.

  “Is it all right if I call you now?” asked a voice that was every bit as appealing as the face that went with it.

  “Yes. I was hoping you would. Where are you?”

  It was getting dark now and I could only see myself in the windows and not the world beyond.

  “I’m parked at the bakery across the street.”

  I turned in the direction he’d indicated and I sent him a slightly embarrassed but still very happy feeling smile. I wished so badly that I could see him as well. He responded to my signal with a quick one-syllable laugh.

  Then he asked, “Wasn’t your ice cream any good? You seem very distracted tonight.”

  It was so obvious that people across the street could tell. I felt my cheeks burning in response. Sam and Trevor were watching me like a traffic accident on the shoulder. I needed to work out some subterfuge (an expedient used to hide something or escape a consequence) immediately.

  “I am. I’ll be home soon. We’re almost finished here.”

  I turned to look at my rubbernecking framily as I said this, for their benefit. It was hard to tell if they were buying it or not.

  “Is there a way we could talk for a few moments before you turn in for the evening?” he inquired.

  Now things really were going my way. I’d already thought this through and had my answer all ready to go, plus it played into the subterfuge.

  “Oh, I think that’s in the tree house. I’ll check before I come in, okay? See you in a bit.”

  I wasn’t sure how long I could keep cool, so I was in a hurry to wrap up this public discourse, doubling as my phone conversation.

  “Wait. One question,” he interjected before I could disconnect. “When did you get a cell phone?”

  I hadn’t thought that one through at all. I chose to dodge it completely.

  “Later, okay? Love you. Bye.”

  I closed the phone and put it back in my purse.

  My friends were testing me, I believe, to see if I would make a move or say something to tip my hand. As much as it was killing me, I didn’t play into it. I didn’t ask about leaving or give off a single vibe of impatience. Instead I used the extended period of time that we sat there at Graeter’s—long after their ice creams were gone and mine was a bowl of lukewarm chocolate soup—preparing for what I would say to my love in our private follow-up encounter. This was the aspect that I had not allowed myself to plan for, out of respect for Murphy’s Law and the dominant role it usually played in my life.

  After I stepped out of Trevor’s car and made my way to the porch, I turned around like I was watching them drive away. Then I hesitated for a few moments, checking to see if Mom had seen the headlights pulling in. She didn’t come looking for me so I decided to head directly for the tree house. There was moonlight providing subtle illumination, but once I made it inside the arboreal mini loft, the difference between eyes open and shut was indistinguishable. Mercifully, he didn’t make me wait.

  “Ellery?” he called quietly. “May I come up?”

  “Yes.”

  Oh please, please do!

  He climbed up and positioned himself across from me, his feet touching against my own. As soon as he was settled, I clicked on the flashlight lantern that I had left for myself earlier in the day and its warm glow filled the very crowded space. He blinked as his eyes adjusted to the light, and then a glorious, warm and inviting smile lit his features, adding extra brightness to the room.

  I offered my hand like I was introducing myself and said, “This is a little redundant, but….my name is Ellery Mayne.”

  He understood and shook hands with me. It felt so good just to touch him. It helped to dispel the sense that I was dreaming.

  “And my name is Ash Ryan. I can’t tell you how happy I am to finally meet you,” he said with a smile that was spiced with a trace of humor.

  “I’m happy too,” I replied in complete understatement.

  “I hope you don’t mind, but I have a few questions for you,” I continued.

  I felt awkward and shy, but I was still very high and it helped me cope.

  “You can ask me anything you like,” he assured me.

  “Why are you and the others watching me?”

  It seemed like that was the best place to start.

  His manner was open and not at all defensive or evasive.

  “I work for a security and surveillance company and we were hired to pr
ovide transparent protection for you. That means we are paid to keep you safe, but not interfere in your life, if possible. Our employer wishes to remain anonymous. It’s one of the terms of our contract.”

  So even they didn’t know who wanted me followed.

  Interesting. Not the least bit helpful, but interesting.

  Also, I’d say they had applied the very loosest interpretation to the guideline about not interfering in my life, but I wasn’t complaining. As I thought these things through he asked me a question in return.

  “May I ask you a question?”

  He was so polite and sincere. I loved it. I loved him. I was actually getting higher, it felt like. I hoped it wasn’t a hard question. I didn’t want him to be disappointed with me only seconds into our conversation.

  “Okay?”

  “When did you realize that we had you under surveillance?”

  Shoot!

  I should have required that he submit a list of all questions prior to our meeting so that I could be prepared. Oh well. Being honest was the right way to go, plus it would take less brainpower.

  “It was the day that I was almost abducted by those two thugs in front of the drugstore.”

  I searched his features trying to sense his response to what I was certain would be a shocking reply.

  His reaction was extremely satisfying. He was lost in thought for a long time, probably seeing scenes of our life in close proximity through a completely new filter. Once his eyes stopped darting and I felt reasonably sure his mind had returned to present time and place I asked the most important question of all, as bravely as I could. It was nearly inaudible.

  “When did you…realize…how you felt about me?”

  He didn’t stop to think; his answer was automatic.

  “It was love at first sight,” he replied, very sincerely, holding my gaze.